Saturday, April 21, 2007
ANGRY LAHHHH
Im so blarddy pissed off!!!!!!!!!
i cant believe some people can actually be so utterly brainless and self-centred and SELFISH!!!!!..... all these people testing my bloody effing patience...if only i can just scream to their faces at the top of my lungs.. CAN U PEOPLE STOP AND THINK FOR ONE DAMN SECOND ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE????....people testing my patience left, right and centre...all i can do is put a smile on my face and trudge on with a brave front...doing wat i think is right and fair...dun do unto others what you dun want others to do unto u...the saying goes...but wat if the OTHERS have already done it...can i assume that they want to be treated as such too? can i then hurt them as much as they hurt me...
sat shaking with anger at the steps...cant believe how much i feel like hurting someone...or something....how much i feel like hurting myself even...i havent had this feeling for a very long time...almost punched the blardy wall....anger taking over my entire being....it took so much effort to actually stop myself from doing something silly or stupid
IM BLOODY FUCKING PISSED OFF!!!!!
Darnisha â¥
6:16 PM
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Wednesday, April 18, 2007
this time its for real
Im happy...truly and honestly happy...
truthfully i totally didnt expect things to happen between us at all. its true wat they say. Things always come when you least expect it.
I have met my match...someone who is able to absorb all my nonsense...my whinings...my temper tantrums...and still come out loving me...such patience...such admiration i have for him...its amazing...he's there when i was sick...there when im happy...there to share my joy...there to share my pain...he is just there....there was a point where i cant stand him always being near...but now i appreciate him being ard me...at least i noe that someone is there to catch me when i fall...to fly with me when im soaring...
truthfully happy....
Darnisha â¥
10:10 AM
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Monday, April 16, 2007
JAHAT!!!
dats the word used on me recently...sebab kau jahat!!!...set me back a few hundred paces...where did i go wrong...what have i done wrong?...y is it that someone so close to me can label me as such?...y is it that my own family views me as such...taking on an outsider's point of view instead?..
as i sat crying into my plate of rice, i was thinking to myself...i fought so hard for my relationships...i didnt deserve this...i dont deserve this...not from her at least...wasnt the first time she said dat to me...brushed it off the first time round...thinking that its just her being the person she is...but she said it again...this time it seemed to be with more malice...dats how i felt at least...
i admit i wasnt serious and playing ard when i was 20...wasnt ready for a serious relationship...but i fought blood, sweat and tears for the previous one...but it still doesnt seem to matter...its still not good enuf....
dia ok...kau tu yg tak ok...kau kan jahat...
Darnisha â¥
9:01 PM
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Friday, April 13, 2007
Not Ready to Make NICE
Dixie Chicks
Forgive, sounds good.
Forget, I'm not sure I could.
They say time heals everything,
But I'm still waiting
I'm through, with doubt,
There's nothing left for me to figure out,
I've paid a price, and i'll keep paying
I'm not ready to make nice,
I'm not ready to back down,
I'm still mad as hell
And I don't have time
To go round and round and round
It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if I could
Cause I'm mad as hell
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should
I know you said
Why can't you just get over it,
It turned my whole world around
and i kind of like it
I made by bed, and I sleep like a baby,
With no regrets and I don't mind saying,
It's a sad sad story
That a mother will teach her daughter
that she ought to hate a perfect stranger.
And how in the world
Can the words that I said
Send somebody so over the edge
That they'd write me a letter
Saying that I better shut up and sing
Or my life will be over
I'm not ready to make nice,
I'm not ready to back down,
I'm still mad as hell
And I don't have time
To go round and round and round
It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if I could
Cause I'm mad as hell
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should
I'm not ready to make nice,
I'm not ready to back down,
I'm still mad as hell
And I don't have time
To go round and round and round
It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if I could
Cause I'm mad as hell
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should
Forgive, sounds good.
Forget, I'm not sure I could.
They say time heals everything,
But I'm still waiting
Darnisha â¥
7:21 PM
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Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Somebody --Depeche Mode
I want somebody to share
Share the rest of my life
Share my innermost thoughts
Know my intimate details
Someone who'll stand by my side
And give me support
And in return
She'll get my support
She will listen to me
When I want to speak
About the world we live in
And life in general
Though my views may be wrong
They may even be perverted
She'll hear me out
And wont easily be converted
To my way of thinking
In fact she'll often disagree
But at the end of it all
She will understand me
Aaaahhhhh....
I want somebody who cares
For me passionately
With every thought and
With every breath
Someone who'll help me see things
In a different light
All the things I detest
I will almost like
I dont want to be tied
To anyone's strings
Im carefully trying to steer clear of
Those things
But when Im asleep
I want somebody
Who will put their arms around me
And kiss me tenderly
Though things like this
Make me sick
In a case like this
I'll get away with it
Aaaahhhhh....
Darnisha â¥
11:58 AM
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Saturday, April 07, 2007
im back
been away for so long...but now im back people!!!!been missing in action the last two weeks...i miss so many people...first of all..i miss my dearest bro..the one truly constant thing in my life is his presence...so yahh...ooh i miss so many people and so many things...but the one thing i didnt miss is work...i wonder why....well time to get back to my life aniways...a note to a friend......im not sure if im overly demanding...but i am sick...just discharged from hospital to be exact...you didnt need to bog me down with your problems...i wouldnt mind listening to it any other day...but not when im half conscious worrying abt my own health problems... u didnt even have the courtesy to ask me what happened to me...was that too much to ask?... u just rambled on and on abt ur woes...wat the hell....the last few months u havent even dropped a line ever to tanya khabar ker or just to say hi..suddenly you keep calling me...in any case, im sorry that you had to go thru such shit in ur life...but hey everyone has their shit to deal with alrite?..cant u just be a little more sensitive?...cant u just be a little more of a friend?...i have other ppl asking me how i am...other ppl worrying abt me...and i have known u longer than i noe some of them...wat's clear is...u sure know where to find ur friends when u need them...u sure know when to toss them away when u are done with them..frankly i am fucking sick and tired of that attitude...that behaviour....i deserve more than this....
Darnisha â¥
3:09 AM
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