Monday, July 30, 2007
the day is coming soon
the day that i have been dreading is coming real soon....its like gonna be here in a few days...as it comes closer, the more i try to convince myself that i do not need the surgery...that the doctor made a mistake...that they did not find anything growing in my body dats not supposed to be there...the fear creeps in ever-slowly...but its there alright...went for my pre-op screening a few days ago....as i sat thru the doctor poking around trying to find the vein to draw blood for the tests and the other doctor asking medical history and stuff, my head was like..."shit, this is for real."....as i sat waiting outside with mother, i told her that it doesnt make sense going for surgery when i am not in pain. Honestly im not in pain except sometimes...even then i have been living with the pain for so long that it doesnt bother me much...except that i cant even walk when the pain is like severe...then it was the financial counselling where the lady tells us how much it would cost and all dat...the surgery is gonna cost close to $5K...bloody waste of money..heheee...yahh im still trying o convince myself that i dun need it...he gives me so much support and encouragement for me to face this...tells me that it wouldnt hurt...that he will be there when i go under and that he will be there when i wake up...tells me "its just key-hole surgery, sayang. a small thing."...tells me that he has gone for such surgery before...but hey, it still doesnt dispel the fears....i am still dreading the day.....
Darnisha â¥
2:47 PM
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Monday, July 23, 2007
just to drop a note...
realised that i havent been updating this page for such a long time...
was reading thru several other blogs...saw the links to mine... was thinking i bloody dunno how to do dat...how to do those linksy stuff....hiakzzzz.... talk about bimbo-ness....been trying to figure it out...but ah well... gave up trying gitu....my alter-ego is a blonde...so forgive me people...my blondness is coming through...
Darnisha â¥
8:57 PM
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Friday, July 06, 2007
Give it BACK to ME!!
dat person: I need to give you back something. Can u meet me?
me: ermmm im working this weekend. mebe another time.
in my head i was thinking...hmmm great wonderful...mebe he would return to me everything and i mean everything that he owes me...money...my MP3!!!!...if he has the brain, he mite just return me the PSP that i bought him for his birthday...i mean yah i bought for his birthday...but still if he feels he owes me, then it makes sense to give THAT BACK TO ME TOO!!!! isnt it????
(another time another day)
dat person: oh since you are too busy to meet me, mebe you can text me your full address.
me: (address??? huh?? how do u squeeze the mp3 and PSP in? hmm mebe parcel lah kan)
dat person: I wanna give you back all the letters that you have given to me.
me: (WAT???!!!!!!! LETTERS????!!!! WHO THE HELL WANTS LETTERS???) ermm i still need to meet you. I want my MP3 back. Meet you sunday?
dat person: fine ill meet you after work on sunday
LETTERS???? honestly? GAWDDDDD!!!!! my mp3...my psp..oh well... i guess there is no chance of me getting my psp back...gitu ehhh...sanggup eh nak post letters back....oh gosh...hmm wait a minute...am i supposed to feel something? am i supposed to feel hurt that he wants to return all remnants of me? but my first thought was.... letters? throw it away lah..not important wat..hiakzzzz...heartless bitch....uwahhhhhhhhhhhhh at the risk of sounding buruk siku...I WANT DAT PSP!!!!!!!!! dats my hard-earned money, fool...and i want it back!!!!!
Darnisha â¥
9:58 AM
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